Canadians are scary!

Just got this from my good friend Bethany in Portland, OR, and had to blog about it for future reference: Canada is one scary place. Check out this public service announcement from the CBC:


People over at Deadspin.com posted some damn funny comments about it, including an IM chat:

AJ Daulerio: Holy shiiit.
Will Leitch: I know!
Will Leitch: It's like the worst PSA of all time.
Will Leitch: I've watched it, like, six times.
AJ Daulerio: It really is. I mean, it was bad enough in the beginning and then it justakes this hard left turn.
AJ Daulerio: They should've had the oven fall on top of her too.
Will Leitch: And then a dog comes and starts gnawing on her face.
AJ Daulerio: And then the busboys start raping her.
Will Leitch: And then someone blows up the restaurant.

Other comments include:

What, not one knife or meat clever falls on her ? Lame.

Fuck. Me. That was awesome. I cannot wait to see the one about sexually-transmitted diseases.

...so that's why my order took so long.

Of course, there's the PSA I saw during the Grey Cup that featured a 6-y/o amputee who lost his leg in a chainsaw accident. And I'm sitting there thinking, "How the hell does a 6-y/o lose their leg in a chainsaw accident?"

Oh. My. God.

They used to show a similar PSA on Sesame Street about the dangers of carrying too many coconut custard pies.

With Swedish accent "Bork Bork Bork!"

wait...so does she die or does her fiance just not want to marry someone with horrible facial scars? so shallow...so shallow...

What's up with the flame up on the stove after she bashes her melon? What was in that pot? Was she simmering pure gasoline? Because that'd be irresponsible.

they shoulda had the busboys come over and start urinating on her to put the fire out, but then she gets freaked out, gets up and then falls down a flight of stairs. that would have really driven the point home. accidents...they dont just "happen."


Inspired, I visited a scary Canadian work safety PSA site (www.prevent-it.ca). Their intro cartoon is a recent amputee whose bloody bandage oozes as a warning to other young Canadian workers:


After you enter the site, the cartoon's amputated hand falls through clouds to Prevent-itville ("Beavis and Butthead" and "Heavy Metal" meet PSA organization). In each scenario, the cartoon character (bloody bandage, pool of blood and all) is shown dealing with limbless life: i.e. he gets his ass handed to him playing video games ("dude, you suck"), etc.

Hopefully, Michael Moore's next project will compare job injury stats between Canada and the US to see if this stuff actually works. My gut says kids think these ads are cool and want to be amputees and burnt up chefs, too.

Yep, Canadians take a pretty tough stance on workplace safety...let's hope they never feel the same way about acid rain.

Will power(less)

Here's the thing about freelance work: You can never leave work to go home (you're already there); work becomes a state of mind that either engulfs or eludes you completely. I'm either working nonstop or unable to start.

There's a moment before I commit to either extreme where my mind says, "okay, this is it...the choice is yours to make and the consequences are blah blah blah blah blah" but it's too late...I've been sucked into an episode of "I Love New York," followed by "The Daily Show," "The Hills," "Gossip Girl," "The Real World," "Sarah Silverman," "My Super Sweet 16," and "Best Week Ever."

When I've exhausted my DVR'd collection of brain-melting drivel, I raid my roommate's despite a growing migraine from the TV's glow and a nagging little "but you've got work to do..." I watch shows I've never cared to see before: "My Name is Earl," "Scrubs," "The Office" and "30 Rock" (I think her old TV only got NBC).

Nine hours later, I'm drowning in a puddle of drool and empty 100-calorie bags of Sun Chips (portion control is also a work-in-progress for me). Avoiding eye contact with the pile of work on my desk, I shuffle to bed determined to wake up "early" (i.e. before 2 pm) and start fresh the next day.

Until I get a job that involves leaving the house, I've got to figure out how to tap my will power and evolve into a worker bee whose hive happens to be her bedroom...


(dig the poster I made at www.despair.com in their DIY section [yes, I used a double negative on purpose -- when you know da rules, you can break 'em]...maybe it should be my Christmas card?)